Porcelain Theology

I Hate You Blockbuster

2011-09-25T10:53:00.008-04:00

Just as Netflix was wounded and on the ropes, Blockbuster prepared a press conference on Friday to make a 'major announcement' in which most people presumed would be their official entry into the movie streaming market.

Let the exodus begin!

But then came their BIG announcement...

Blockbuster's streaming catalog of movies would soon be available to Dish customers for a small extra fee a month. Wait -- what? That's it???

Sure, that may be a great deal for 17 people who are Dish customers, but how does that actually merit a press conference?

Many current and former disaffected Netflix had high hopes for an alternative to a company they had lost their faith in. All this did was just add to the disappointment in the current state of movie streaming and probably give everyone over at Netflix a pretty good chuckle. Good job Blockbuster...

I'm glad you jerks are pretty much out of business. Fuck you guys too.

I Hate You Netflix

2011-09-21T20:53:00.009-04:00

Ok, maybe hate is a little strong of a word. Nonetheless, what has happened with Netflix is the very reason why I cannot and will never understand why some people become ‘fans’ of brands and companies. Sure, some companies have impressive goods, but the only thing they love about us is our money. It’s like falling in love with a stripper.

Netflix was once a company that almost everyone felt really good about. While they weren't without flaw, there was a lot to like about them and their reasonably priced service. Then, out of nowhere, they blindsided their loyal customer base with the infamous price hike of September 2011 that caused a million people to up and exit stage left.

Netflix has now basically turned into the cable company – and let’s face it, companies like Comcast are about as cool as the IRS. You have to pay them, but you absolutely loathe doing it.

While mass outrage ensued, the only people more annoying than those running the company were the Netflix faithful who were posting comments like, “When you think about it, it’s still a great deal for all that you get. Where else are you going to get this service? Stop complaining already.” STFU fanboys...

It wasn't until their stockholders finally lost their confidence in the company that then bought on Netflix's sudden remorse about their arrogance. But even as their CEO 'apologized', it was all just a ploy to spring another bad idea upon us with a fittingly stupid name: Qwikster. We're really sorry and all that, but you're STILL going to pay more AND you're going to be further inconvenienced if you continue to hang around... blah, blah, blah... Gee thanks.

Meanwhile on Wall Street...

You know what? I DO hate you, Netflix. Everything you have done since you announced the price hike has sucked. I enjoy seeing your customers leaving en masse. I love that your stock is in freefall. I think it's great that your competition now smells blood in the water and pose a threat to your long-term future. You guys brought every bit of this upon yourselves all because you didn't respect your customers.

So fuck you, Netflix. Fuck You.

Do Jurors Have A Right To Privacy?

2011-07-07T19:24:00.031-04:00

Have you ever come home from work looking to just kick back and relax, but before you do, you opt check the postal mail and see that official-looking envelope staring right back at you?

Your stomach starts to feel a little uneasy as you hesitantly begin to open the letter and dreading what might be inside. You then unfurl the folded contents within with a slightly shaky hand and realize that your worst fear has come true. Yep... YOU'VE GOT JURY DUTY.

Without a good enough lie and with no other way to get out of it, you're going to have to report to your local -- or God forbid -- your nearby federal courthouse. All you can do is hope that your name doesn't get called, but if you do get called, that they don't like something about you and that you're services will no longer be needed.

But as luck would have it, they DO like you and they want YOU to serve on their time-wasting, embarrassingly low-pay jury. FUCK!!!

You didn't ask for this, but the law says you've gotta do it. Ugh...

I once had a co-worker who decided that he was too busy at work to be bothered with jury duty that day. He then got a not-so-friendly phone call telling him that if he didn't show up within a half hour, a state police car would be summonsed, he would be placed in handcuffs and then they would drive him from the workplace to courthouse. I must say that I've never seen someone leave the building so fast.

So now you've been kindly 'asked' to serve on a jury and you find out it's going to be this high profile case that the entire country will be watching. Your life now for the next month-plus is going to be eating, drinking and shitting this case. How fun.

Since you are now totally hosed and have no choice but to do your civil duty, you decide that you'll be the best darn impartial juror you can be.

During your particular case, the prosecution presents a shabby argument, is unable to prove an actual murder took place, presented various disputable evidence and could provide no real motive whatsoever.

You and the other 11 other jurors now have no choice but to go by the book and determine that this accused person -- while unlikeable, irresponsible and not especially believable -- is 'Not Guilty' because no guilt could actually be proven beyond a reasonable doubt. The decision doesn't mean that you believe that this person is innocent, but that no one can be reasonably certain that they actually committed a serious crime.

Little do you know that upon the announcement of your collective decision that the outside world now thinks you are the stupidest people on Earth and just made the worst decision in the history of bad decisions -- or at least the worst decision since 1995.

The average person is outraged because they don't have to apply the law to how they feel nor do they have to digest all of the details of the case that you did. Their emotions dictate their conclusions about the case and those conclusions don't actually have to be founded in fact or be put up against a 'beyond a reasonable doubt' standard. Plus, it doesn't help that the media had convinced everyone of this person's guilt all along.

Luckily, the judge of your trial worries about your well-being and decides that he's going to withhold all of your names so that you won't be exposed to death threats or worse. The problem is that some news organizations don't really care about your well-being and want to get all of your names in print for every unstable kook to harass you, threaten you or even harm you. Is that really fair to a jury who were legally bound to to perform their civil duty? Of course it's not.

The point here is that folks on this Casey Anthony jury -- regardless of how people felt about their decision -- were forced by law to be on that jury. They didn't elect to be part of this media circus and were never interested in being part of the story. They were simply doing their duty -- the very same duty that most of us have been or will be asked to do at some point in our lives.

Now if some of the jurors want to be bold enough and put themselves out there for public consumption, that's on them. But I'm sure that some folks on that jury just want to go back to living a normal life again and if they do, shouldn't they be allowed that right?

Until today, I had no idea that it is normal procedure to release the names of a jury right after a trial concludes. I understand that it's done so that our legal system is open and honest, but the idea that some news organizations are trying to get these names out into the media ASAP seems irresponsible to say the least.

After all, should one of those jurors actually be harmed by some kook who invested way too much emotion into this case, who would actually benefit from that? The same people who want to put these jurors' names out there, of course. The media would have another big story and they wouldn't feel the least bit guilty about glorifying it as they do with every tragedy.

In my opinion, there should be an extended window of time for all jurors' names to be publicly released to ensure the safety of those who serve. Until the next media obsession comes along to erase this case from 99% of our short-term memories, these poor people may be in danger.

And if something did happen to one of these jurors or their families, who would ever want to be a juror on the next high-profile, highly-charged case? Would jurors begin to quietly begin wonder about their own well-being if they made an unpopular decision? If the seed of concern actually took root in some jurors' minds, outcomes of future cases could be affected.

While multiple states are now swiftly drafting a "Caylee Anthony Law" as we speak all because of the sour grapes about the decision in this case, you won't likely see anyone drafting a law to protect the identities and the well-being of these jurors due to their highly unpopular 'Not Guilty' decision. Who is going to be eager to protect those innocent people and look out for their best interest? If the media is able to get their way, no one at all.

Casey Anthony Jury Gets It Right

2011-07-05T19:04:00.022-04:00

Things we learned today:

1. The justice system actually works
2. Most people presume guilt over innocence
3. People really, really need lives

Whether you agree with the decision in the Casey Anthony trial or not, ultimately the correct decision was made by the jury. Wait, what?!?!

That doesn't mean that Casey Anthony didn't kill her daughter, but the evidence proving that she commmited murder simply wasn't there. As of today, all we know is that no one really knows. Of course, a lot of people think they know and that's why we have all of this silly outrage today.

In some ways, it was actually fun to watch the internet lose its collective mind today over all this. The media had snookered so many people into believing that this trial/circus was just a necessary procedure before Casey Anthony was sent to the gas chamber. Whoops! All this did was cause a virtual lynch mob of crazy people who invested WAY too much of their time and emotion into this trial.

One of the main reasons that people were so caught off guard by the verdict is because it's human nature to presume guilt over innocence. Let's be honest, the second we saw Casey Anthony's mugshot and heard what she was accused of, we all thought to ourselves, "That is the woman killed who her daughter." Then some of us thought, "Yeah, I'd do her." But none of us ever really thought, "That is the woman who is accused of killing her daughter and she might actually be innocent."

Luckily, the standard in our court system is just the opposite of how we are prone to think. And with that being the standard in our legal system and not who is simply a crummy person in general, it should then be no surprise that the jury deemed Casey Anthony 'Not Guilty' today.

Do people honestly think that they know better than the 12 jurors who had to sit through weeks and weeks of this entire proceeding? These folks were forced to endure every last detail of this trial, but somehow THEY are the ones who got it wrong while the long list of lifeless couch potatoes, random internet posters and B-list celebs who all rushed to their Twitter accounts to voice their outrage are actually the real legal experts concerning this case? LOL, c'mon...

So now we now have a nation full of bleeding hearts (with blood-thirsty rage) over this trial, but what gets me is that every single day when you pick up your local paper or watch your local news, countless murders, deaths, rapes, assaults, etc. are reported and the vast majority of us don't even flinch at those stories. Where are all the tears and anger for all of the average, every day deaths, murders, etc. that the media doesn't glorify in this obscene manner? Do they really matter any less? And if they don't, why do we care so much less about those?

Personally, the ONLY thing I care about is if someone in our country is accused of murder and no one saw them do it, the prosecution sure as shit better be able to prove it beyond a reasonable doubt because that is what our justice system demands. If it was you or I who was falsely accused of a crime, we would all hope that a jury would not let their own human nature decide our fate, but base it on the actual evidence brought against us, no?

Today, the only things we know for sure is that the justice system still occasionally works and that Nancy Grace is still an idiot.

Should Anthony Weiner Resign? No.

2011-06-07T21:11:00.029-04:00

Fact: Each political party has its share of scumbags. Yesterday, Democrats officially added one more to the collective pile in Rep. Anthony Weiner.

The outrage that Republicans feel about Weiner is understandable as I've certainly wished for the constituents of Republican offenders to either vote them out or to put enough pressure on them so that they'd want leave.

However, it's laughable when Republicans start calling for Anthony Weiner to resign from his position after these same people said NOTHING when their own party's creeps had opted to hang in there after their indiscretions.

Let's be clear: Anthony Weiner is a fucking idiot. I really admire him as a politician, but I'm sure hoping that his wife wises up and opts to divorce his ass. He just doesn't deserve such a fine, fine woman.

That being said, based on what we actually know thus far, he shouldn't step down as he hasn't done anything illegal. If we find out otherwise, I'm all for giving him the boot.

Ultimately, his constituents will have the power to decide his fate and if they don't value these qualities in their congressional representative, they'll have an opportunity to say so at the polls.

When it comes to letches like Republican Senators Ensign and Vitter, those guys actually broke laws. Even that aside, they both pushed their own high moral standards onto the American people in the form of legislation that would 'protect marriage' -- something they clearly didn't value themselves.

These same two clowns had actually demanded that President Clinton resign for doing the very same thing they eventually got caught doing. Of course, neither of them resigned when exposed. And guess which other Republican proclaimed the very same thing way back when he was a US congressman...

Even when one Republican senator was arrested for soliciting gay sex in an airport restroom, Republicans didn't demand his resignation -- although he kinda-sorta initially gave it. But once he found that his party wasn't going to push him out for being a closet homosexual who sought hot man-love in public bathrooms because they valued his reliable Republican vote more than anything else, he managed to serve out his full term without any objection.

The point is, if you didn't call for resignations when your own party's creeps had their indiscretions AND broke laws, then STFU when it comes to demanding that Anthony Weiner resign from his position and stop being a hypocrite who only demands such action when it's the other guys who do it.

TOP 5: Hair Metal Albums

2011-05-20T22:45:00.030-04:00

The age of 80s hair metal was pure bliss back in the day, wasn't it? I'm not saying that it was a time to necessarily be proud of in terms of music or style, but it was undeniably fun. And then one day it was unceremoniously ushered out of our lives by the likes of those whiny, no-fun grunge bands. Bastards.

Anyhow, back in these good 'ol days, it was pretty much mandatory that dudes had a lots and lots of hair, over-the-top videos and sexy girls parading around in the tightest & skimpiest outfits on-and-off camera. To this day, I still don't know if anything compares to the hotness of those whorish 80s chicks.

Anyhow, 80s hair metal fun quickly turned into embarrassment and mockery during the 90s. Not only did you then have to deny ever being a fan of these bands, but you surely didn't want to be caught dead blaring "Talk Dirty To Me" or "Cherry Pie" on the car stereo within an earshot of anyone you knew or anyone who might know you. The stakes for possible reputation-ruining humiliation were just too high and it just wasn't worth the risk.

Today, the rules have changed. The 80s are now revered and bands like Poison and some of the lesser known acts are still out there on the touring circuit while many of the grunge bands who put the stake through the heart of hair metal are long since gone.

Personally, I can't say that there are a lot of albums from this era that have stood the test of time, but there are a few I still enjoy giving a whirl every now and again -- albums that I would even rock out to with the car windows rolled down!

5. BulletBoys - BulletBoys

I can't say that I ever really dug the Bulletboys beyond their debut album, but it's still a pretty rockin' album with quite a few good songs.

While "Smooth Up In Ya" still manages to get the juices flowing, "Shoot The Preacher Down", "Hell On My Heels" and "Owed To Joe" are some quality tunes as well and their edgy cover of "For The Love of Money" kept them from being a one-hit wonder.

4. Heaven's Edge - Heaven's Edge

Probably not a band that had a lot of national success, but they took off here locally and got themselves a major label deal with Columbia Records. The singer has a total 80s voice, but the album rocks pretty hard overall and the musicianship is top-notch for this kind of music.

To this day, this is one hair metal album that I not only still listen to, but feel there isn't one bad song on it. I was sure that "Skin To Skin" was going to break these guys, but it never really happened. Too bad.

3. Sleeze Beez - Screwed, Blued & Tattooed

Most of the Norwegian metal bands I know of are all that scary, dark, death metal stuff, but before most of those bands came to be, the Sleeze Beez gave the world Screwed, Blued & Tattooed.

"Stranger Than Paradise" was the song that got these guys their mainstream notoriety, but "Rock in the Western World", "Heroes Die Young" and "When The Brains Go To The Balls" made for a great supporting cast. "This Time", IMO, is one of the best power ballads of this era, but it just seemed to get lost in the shuffle among all the other ballads that other hair metal bands were flooding the market with.

Unfortunately, by their second album and even with the help of Gene Simmons, the magic of Screwed, Blued was gone completely.

2. Skid Row - Skid Row

I remember hearing "Here I Am" just one time on the local metal radio show before this album ever came out and I was already sold on these guys. The next weekend, they played "Youth Gone Wild" and I was off to Wee Three Records to get me a cassette of this new, unknown band. Skid Row were the first band that I ever 'discovered' before the masses caught on.

Anyhow, Skid Row is really a phenomenal album for this genre of music. "I Remember You" -- while admittedly good -- is a bit too sappy for my taste, but the rest of the record kicks a great deal of ass. "Big Guns", "Sweet Little Sister", "Makin' A Mess" and "Piece of Me" all help make this the fine album that it is.

1. Slaughter - Stick It To Ya

My initial interest in Slaughter came from the fact that the main guys -- Mark Slaughter and Dana Strum -- were fresh out of the Vinnie Vincent Invasion (solo project by the ex-KISS guitarist). But after hearing songs like "Eye To Eye", "Up All Night" and "She Wants More" on the local metal radio show, I scooped this one up the first week it was out.

Stick It To Ya certainly has an element of cheese to it, but it still has a bit of an AC/DC-ish hard rock sound as well. "Mad About You" and "Burnin' Bridges" are good guitar-driven songs while "Spend My Life" and "Gave Me Your Heart" rock just enough to make you forget about the lovey-dovey lyrics. As a whole, I still dig this album today.

Unlike the other bands on this list, Slaughter is the only hair band where I liked a few of their proceeding albums as well. Still, nothing they did beyond Stick It To Ya came close to rivaling this quality effort.

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Do you have any guilty pleasures from this era of the 80s that you still give a whirl every now and again in between listening to the music that you normally play? Leave me a comment and let me know!

KISS Alive II 35

2011-05-03T20:07:00.020-04:00

Just three years ago, KISS began celebrating the 35th anniversary of their most acclaimed album: Alive!. The band toured the world playing the majority of the album in order and KISS fans poured out of the woodwork to catch this very successful tour.

There's no doubt that Alive! is a great album. It has been said that it may be one of the best live albums ever recorded. However, some within the ranks of the KISS Army (including myself) feel that Alive! is not the best live record in the band's catalog.

I present to you, KISS' finest live album:

Alive II opens up with so much energy that it practically melts your ears! KISS proves they mean business from the opening riffs of "Detroit Rock City" and puts together a blistering audio assault that extends all the way though to the bombastic conclusion of "Shout it Out Loud".

If you were lucky enough to own the vinyl LP, you were treated to one of the coolest stage photos ever seen. As a kid, I can remember marveling at this epic shot and imaging what a KISS show was really like.

One of the main differences between Alive! and Alive II is that this album features many of KISS' biggest singles: "Detroit Rock City, "Love Gun", "Calling Dr. Love", "Beth", "Hard Luck Woman", "Christine Sixteen" and "Shout it Out Loud." Aside from "Rock and Roll all Nite", many of the songs on Alive! are fairly unknown the average Joe.

Hits aside, some of best songs on the album can be found are scattered in between including Paul Stanley's "I Stole Your Love", "Makin' Love" and "I Want You." Each one is a fiercer, superior version of their original studio counterpart.

No song in the KISS catalog benefits more from the live treatment than "God of Thunder." The version on Destroyer is a plodding track marred by echo and the strange voices of little kids. This version features a faster pace, a devastating riff and animalistic vocals by the world's most famous Demon.

One of the coolest things about Alive II is that it features a song by every band member. Fans were finally able to hear Ace Frehley take to the microphone and croon his debut KISS song, "Shock Me", which concludes with a brief, but scorching guitar solo. And while Alive II's version of "Beth" isn't nearly as polished as the studio version, hearing the crowd clapping in unison and screaming at the top of their lungs really helps give it a charm of its own.

When it comes down to it, the reason I believe that Alive II is superior to Alive! is simply because the live versions of these songs are almost all better (and many significantly better) than the studio tracks. While the performances of the songs on Alive! are admittedly great as well, the studio versions of those songs are as good or better.

So cheers to Alive II on its 35th Anniversary -- at least according to KISS' accelerated calendar -- and let's hope that there will be an Alive II 35 Tour in the near future!

Alive II:

1. Detroit Rock City
2. King of the Night Time World
3. Ladies Room
4. Makin' Love
5. Love Gun
6. Calling Dr. Love
7. Christine Sixteen
8. Shock Me
9. Hard Luck Woman
10. Tomorrow and Tonight
11. I Stole Your Love
12. Beth
13. God of Thunder
14. I Want You
15. Shout it Out Loud

Miley Cyrus Is A Jealous C*ntbag

2011-03-30T20:24:00.012-04:00

“It should be harder to be an artist.
You shouldn’t just be able to put a song
on YouTube and go out on tour.”
-- Miley Cyrus, Forgotten Former Teen Queen

That’s hilarious coming from someone who only got her foot in the door in entertainment world because of her famous father. And it’s equally amusing to hear Miley snobbishly throwing around the term ‘artist’ as if she actually earned her standing as one and those YouTube sensations have not.

Sure, screw the average nobody who gets their lucky break via YouTube where everyday people can decide if they like truly something or not. Apparently Miley would prefer it if we went back to when it was entirely up to Hollywood bigwigs and their marketing teams to manufacture who they want us to like.

It just sounds to me that someone is just a little jelly that someone as pedestrian as Rebecca Black is not only stealing away her pop-sensation spotlight, but already has a song more well-known to the general public than anything Miley ever sang.

Please just allow us to enjoy the feel-good terribleness of Rebecca Black for her entire 15-seconds of fame without you poo-pooing all over it with your catty remarks all because your post-Hanna Montana career is hitting rock bottom.

Can't you just shut up and go back to taking candid self-shots and undie pics? Sadly, when Miley opens her big, dumb, super-annoying mouth, she kinda puts a slight damper on my inappropriate attraction to her.

Joey Belladonna Review 3/26/11

2011-03-28T20:22:00.024-04:00

Joey Belladonna: Live @ The Cube 3/26/11

I have never seen a national act in a smaller venue than The Cube in Newark, Delaware. This place probably couldn't hold more than 150 people without breaking a fire code.

I've definitely seen bigger acts in larger venues give less of a show that what Joey Belladonna delivered to an audience of about 100 or so. The intimate setting really added to the fun of the evening for the crowd and seemingly even for Joey as well.

Belladonna had a lot of interaction with the audience from commenting on the many random things the inebriated fans were blurting out in between songs to the things that he was observing them do. Joey even grabbed several people's cameras who were filming him in the front and began to film the audience and the band with them.

Musically, the show kicked off with an energetic rendition of the Anthrax classic, "Among The Living" which then lead into a groovy version of "Medusa". One lone jackass attempted to form his own mosh pit 30-seconds into the show by throwing himself into surrounding fans and knocking them over like bowling pins. This ultimately lead to an immediate ejection as the tiny venue could not support a mosh pit of any size.

Over the duration of the two-plus hour show, Joey Belladonna kept the non-Anthrax material to a minimum only playing three solo songs, two Dio covers and a Hendrix track. The rest of the set was devoted to Anthrax tunes which kept the crowd frothed up for the entire show.

Some of the other memorable songs performed during the evening included: "Antisocial", "Caught in a Mosh", "In My World", "Madhouse", "Indians" and "Got The Time".

The show concluded with a trio of popular Anthrax oldies: "Efilnikufesin (N.F.L.)", "I Am The Law" and "Metal Thrashing Mad".

I really give big props to Joey Belladonna for putting on a great show for a such a small audience at The Cube. He didn't probably have to play more than 70 to 80 minutes to meet the crowd's expectations, but Joey kicked our asses for over 120 minutes and kept us entertained the entire time.

Fred Phelps: Hero For A Day

2011-03-02T23:58:00.009-05:00

Today, free speech won another round in the Supreme Court of the United States. In this instance, it's rather hard to feel too joyous when the winner of the case is the despicable hate-monger Fred Phelps and his clan of crazies from the Westboro Baptist Church.

Sometimes in life, the victory is simply more important than the victor.

On the surface, it would seem like a no-brainer that Fred Phelps’ homophobic, anti-military protests outside of funerals should have been stopped by the High Court today. Americans understandably and overwhelmingly object to the actions of these deplorable troublemakers -- myself included.

That being said, free speech does not and should not discriminate between who it protects and who it doesn’t. Unfortunately, that even includes the Westboro Baptist Church.

Even if a majority of people disagree with the cretins who perform these ‘protests’, the minority voice in this country must be protected too. That freedom is what makes us America. That’s what makes us great.

People in our country have the right to wave a flag or burn it. They have the right to support the government or admonish it. They have the right to march for more rights or against the rights of others. The bottom line is that people deserve to have a voice even when it isn't deserving of my/yours/our respect.

We cannot pick and choose between who deserves free speech. What sounds disagreeable to you probably sounds agreeable to someone else – even if it’s only to a handful of ears. Sometimes pointy Vulcan ears.

Yes, our country would be a better place without Fred Phelps and his band of kooks, but for once (and probably only once), he was on the right side of an issue even if he is wrong about everything else.

TOP 5: Danzig Albums

2011-03-01T01:38:00.033-05:00

This is the first of many future Top 5 lists that I'm going to piece together on this blog as they sporadically spill out of my brain. Why? Because.

This Top 5 was inspired by the announcement of Danzig's upcoming 2011 Spring Tour. Being that Danzig is one of my all-time favorite bands, here is one random internet asshole's Top 5 Danzig Albums:

5. I Luciferi (2002)

Admittedly, I wrestled with choosing between I Luciferi and 4p, but ultimately I chose the album which I spend less time skipping past songs. If you asked me back in 2003, I would not have rated I Luciferi this high, but this album has continuously grown on me over the years.

This album kicks your ass for eight straight songs before getting into the so-so territory of the CD. If anything, it was just nice for Danzig to finally get back to such a guitar-driven sound again.

Highlights: "Black Mass", "Liberskull", "Dead Inside"

4. Deth Red Sabaoth (2010)

The best thing about Deth Red Sabaoth is that it is consistantly good from beginning to end. After the first couple discs, Danzig albums each contain their own varying amounts of Danzig filler, but Deth Red Sabaoth is arguably filler-free (well, except for maybe the gothy musical piece, "Infanticle").

While this album may not have a true standout song like the many Danzig albums before it, Deth Red is a collection of pretty darn good songs. Loyal Danzig fans have been rewarded with a great modern day effort from our beloved evil Elvis.

Highlights: "Hammer of the Gods", "Rebel Spirits", "Deth Red Moon"

3. Satan's Child (1999)

I'm probably in the minority of Danzig fans who would rate Satan's Child this high in the Danzig catalog, but like Deth Red Sabaoth, I feel that Satan's Child is a solid effort thoughout.

This was the first album where Glenn Danzig's voice started to show some real wear-and-tear from years of screaming at the gods above. Still, Satan's Child rocks pretty mightily and is easily the best non-Rick Rubin production a Danzig album was ever treated to.

Highlights: "Belly of the Beast", "Unspeakable", "Firemass"

2. Danzig (1988)

Danzig's debut album is usually noted as his best album by most... and understandably so! It's hard to argue when it contains three of his most iconic tunes -- one being the mega-hit, "Mother".

Beyond the hits, this album is fleshed out with some of the better songs of Glenn Danzig's career. This is certainly one album that every metal fan should own.

Highlights: "Twist of Cain", "Not of This World", "Am I Demon"

1. Lucifuge (1990)

Lucifuge was the first Danzig album I bought way back in 1990 and I remember it made such an impression on me when I opened up the cassette and it folded out into an upside down cross. Go Satan!

Right out the gate, Lucifuge immediately gets you into a fist-pumping frenzy and then you're off and running into Danzig's finest masterpiece.

Highlights: "Long Way Back From Hell", "Snakes of Christ", "Devil's Plaything"

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Agree? Disagree? Leave a comment and let me know!

I'll closeout this post with a video of my all-time favorite Danzig song:

"Devil's Plaything"

Poll: Health Care Law Repealed?

2011-02-25T01:23:00.022-05:00

Apparently almost half of America either believes that the Health Care Law passed in 2009 was repealed or might have been repealed according to a new poll. Seriously, WTF America?!?

How can we live in the 'information age' and have so many misinformed people? Are folks really that dumb or are they just willfully ignorant to the facts? Unfortunately, this isn't the only major issue people are clearly misinformed about.

In 2010, a poll was taken where only 12% of people correctly knew that President Obama actually lowered their taxes while 24% believed their taxes were raised. Even scarier, as the year went on, the number of people who believed they were paying higher taxes actually grew!

By election day in November 2010, 52% of likely voters wrongly believed their taxes went up during Obama's first two years in office.

Then you got those kooks who believe that our US president isn't even a US citizen. Of course, if there were a single ounce of credible proof of this, Barack Obama would have to step down as president. Obviously, that hasn't happened.

A poll of GOP voters in 2010 showed that an eye-popping 72% of them were either unsure of his US citizenship or believed he was not a US citizen at all. Clearly such beliefs aren't based on facts so why are so many people willing to accept false information as truth?

For some, the origins of false beliefs simply come from hate (see photo above). For others, it's a matter of ignoring the facts because it plays into how they feel about those who are different from themselves (i.e. political views, skin color, religion, etc.). Still, the fact that this many people accept these lies and falsehoods for truth is really quite alarming.

How are we to be the greatest country on earth when we have this many tool boxes in our shed? Stop choosing to be 'morans' America.

Oscar Weekend Predictions

2011-02-24T18:25:00.027-05:00

The big mystery this weekend is all about who will win at the Oscars! Actually, it's not a mystery at all. Everyone knows who is going to win all the major awards because Hollywood can't get enough of congratulating itself during the prior two months preceding the Academy Awards and by now, it's pretty obvious who most of the winners will be.

As if this topic hasn't been done to death everywhere else on the interwebs, here are my predictions for a few of the key awards at this Sunday's Oscars:

Best Picture: The King's Speech

If I had one vote and only my vote counted, "The Fighter" would win Best Picture. It was a great film and it was my favorite of the nominated lot. "The King's Speech" is also a deserving film and my runner-up for the award. IMO, it's also more deserving than its main rival in the category, "The Social Network". "Winter's Bone" and "127 Hours" both deserve a tip of the hat as well.

Best Actor: Colin Firth

Everybody (well, except for maybe Jeff Bridges) gave a true Oscar-worthy performance. That being said, Colin Firth was by far and away the Best Actor in a Motion Picture in 2010. Jesse Eisenberg also gave an great performance and it's unfortunate for him that he has to be going up against an such a strong performance by Firth. James Franco also deserves an honorable mention as he was a one man show in "127 Hours" and the film is only as good as his performance.

Best Actress: Natalie Portman

This one's not even a contest. While I do think that Natalie Portman gave the best performance of 2010 for an actress, I wouldn't necessarily say it was one for the ages. Aside from her solid acting job, she ultimately deserves the Oscar due to the added difficulty of ballet dancing and, of course, her incredibly fappable bedroom scenes.

Best Supporting Actor: Christian Bale

Christian Bale's acting performance was probably the best of the year, but because he wasn't the main character in "The Fighter", he'll have to settle for the Best Supporting Actor trophy. In almost any other Oscar ceremony, Geoffrey Rush would be taking home the gold for his role in "The King's Speech", but he's just no match for Bale this year.

Best Supporting Actress: Melissa Leo

I'm not sure I was entirely sold on Melissa Leo winning this award until I saw how different she really is from the character she plays in "The Fighter." Of course she's great in the movie, but then so is Amy Adams. It's just more of a stretch for Leo to become her character than it was for Adams. Hailee Steinfeld's performance was also noteworthy in "True Grit", but since no one in the film had a larger role than she did, Steinfeld simply does not belong in this category.

Best Animated Film: Toy Story 3

The biggest scam going at the Oscars is if an animated film gets nominated for Best Picture, it can still be nominated in this category as well. Sure "Toy Story 3" was a good flick and it pulled at your heartstrings like no other animated movie I've ever seen, but it still should only be represented in one category. Unfortunately, "How To Train Your Dragon" is going to get robbed.

While the Oscars are an enjoyable watch for movie buffs like myself, my main gripe (as mentioned earlier) is that there will be no surprises awaiting us this weekend. There are just too many award ceremonies before the Academy Awards ever takes place that suck most of the fun away from guessing who might win an Oscar.

Maybe it's time for the Oscars to move its date earlier in the year so that they can snuff out all of the other lesser award shows who collectively erode the impact of their show. Just a thought...

Top 3 Free Cloud Music Sites For Your Droid

2011-02-08T21:22:00.035-05:00

Not long ago, I scoured the web for tips concerning the best free sites/services to upload my music in order to stream on my Android phone. Personally, I didn't find a lot of great resources for this advice so I decided to devote a blog post to it. Please leave a comment if you found this post at all helpful and/or if you have any cloud storage suggestions.

So without further adieu... in my experience, here are the Top 3 Free Cloud Music Sites for use with your Android phone:

3. MP3tunes

The Upside: MP3tunes gives you 2 GB of free space. Actually, the best thing about MP3tunes is that they'll give you the most space to play with. When I signed up, they started me with 2 GB and at some point upgraded me 10 GB. I don't know if every new user will get this perk, but 2 GB is about the maximum amount of free space you'll currently find out there.

The Downside: In my experience, the Droid app is riddled with problems. For starters, some of the albums simply won't display in Album mode. The album is listed, but he songs won't appear. The only way to find those songs is in Song mode. Another flaw is if you have songs with the same name. Maybe you have a studio, live and demo versions of the same song -- or if another artist has a song with the same name -- the app will sometimes not play the correct song. There are other problems, but that's just a couple of the bigger issues that I've experienced.

Overall: MP3tunes has potential -- especially since they are pretty generous with free space, but the web and app experience can be buggy. It's definitely worth signing up for, but its flaws may make it more frustrating than fun.

2. Mougg

The Upside: Mougg offers 1 GB of free storage. From my experience, Mougg is the easist to use as it takes a fairly bare-bones approach to the music storage process. In terms of uploading, it is the easiest and most hassle-free process that I've dealt with. On your app, you can either view your music by Songs or Artist. You can also create playlists on the Mougg website in which you can then play on your Droid app.

The Downside: Mougg is indeed pretty bare-bones -- actually, it's currently a bit TOO bare-bones. Mougg doesn't care about song order. It completely ignores the song numbering information saved in your MP3 files. In the main folder, it orders the songs the way you uploaded them. Under Artist view, it simply orders them alphabetically. Here is where creating custom playlists could be a helpful workaround for listening to songs in album order, but unfortunately, this is Mougg's biggest flaw: you cannot custom order your songs in a playlist.

Useful Tip: Because Mougg gives you absolutely no control over the ordering of your songs, you won't be able to listen to your songs in album order unless you upload the songs in backwards order. When using Windows, click Browse to find the folder with your MP3s. When in folder mode, make sure you sort the songs by song number so that they are in numerical order. Then when you highlight the entire group of songs, make sure that the first song to be uploaded is the last song on the album and that the entire album uploads in backwards order (i.e. 10, 9, 8.... 3, 2, 1). When they are all uploaded, they will display on the main screen in the proper chronological order. Now when you create a playlist and you pull over each song into it, they will remain ordered in the proper album order (i.e. 1, 2, 3, etc.).

Overall: It's worth claiming your free 1 GB of space. For me, it's been the site where I store all the additonal albums that I was unable to fit onto...

1. mSpot

The Upside: mSpot gives you 2 GB of free space. The great thing about mSpot is that it not only gives you 2 GB of space, but depending on what quality you want your songs to play at, it may convert the files to a lower bitrate than your MP3s were ripped at giving you even more space for music. I currently have almost 90 albums and over 1000 songs consuming 1.98 GB of space at the medium quality option. It's sure nice to have all that music available to stream saving me 2 GB (or more) of space that I now don't have to store on the internal memory of my phone.

The Downside: There honestly aren't a lot of downsides. The uploading process is probably my main gripe if I have one. For some unknown reason, it can develop issues with certain songs and will feel the need to re-upload them again and again with each computer restart. In one instance, I just decided to just re-rip one problematic song and doing so seemed to satisfy mSpot. There are some other little annoyances, but overall, not enough to make a stink over. Also, mSpot's customer service is actually pretty responsive should you run into any issues.

Overall: I use mSpot more than the other two cloud music services combined. It's really pure awesome overall. If you are looking for just one cloud music service to use with your Android phone, download the mSpot app and get started!

Dallas: Congratulations For Murdering Animals

2011-02-07T23:50:00.011-05:00

This morning I went online to check the latest sports news and I came across a headline so bizarre that I had to blink a few extra times just to make sure that all the sleep gunk was cleared from my eyes and that I was really reading it correctly:

Dallas Honors Michael Vick
With Key to City.

So let me get this straight...

Fight, torture and murder innocent animals and run an illegal dog fighting ring right behind your home and what do you get?

Injure your knee in the second quarter of a playoff game and because it doesn't appear to be severe enough to the beer-swilling slobs at home to merit not returning to the field, what do you get?

Worse yet, the unlikeable human behind Jay Cutler in this ESPN poll isn't even the dog killer guy, but the guy who has a thing for raping women for offseason fun. Boy, ain't that funny...

You would think it would be easy to now go off on a long rant about how wrong Dallas is and all of the rest, but I'm honestly at a loss for words. I simply don't understand people and there just aren't enough faces or palms to express the disappointment I feel towards those who are so willing to celebrate such horrible human beings all because they win some meaningless sports games. Ugh...

Michelle Williams: "Waaaaaa..."

2010-12-16T20:05:00.011-05:00

Some things drive me crazy and other things drive me REALLY crazy: People who are too afraid to make a right turn at a red light when there is no signage telling them that they can't; asshole guys who manage to consistently score hot girls; the outrageous price of printer ink; the inexplicable appeal of Nickelback; and ex-Dawson Creekers who bellyache about the very thing that gave them their big break.

No, not him. I present to you the girl formerly known as Jen Lindley who is only famous due to the very popular television show she is about to whine about:

"I said to a friend being on Dawson's Creek was kind of like being a mobster.
You set up a shop selling pizza but in the back you're laundering money.
You're doing one thing in plain sight and secretly plotting something else.
I was plotting my tastes, my interests, my beliefs and hopes for what
I could be. It was hard getting jobs I wanted. I was a pop tart."

Boo-fucking-hoo. Michelle Williams might have had a full-time career in a pizza shop had it not been for that show. It's because of Dawson's Creek that she even gets a chance be in a major movie.

I can understand how some actors struggle with the typecasting that comes when they are a popular character on a successful TV show, but in reality, that's pretty great bad luck to have. Most of the other cast members also managed to have some success beyond the TV show so it's not as if being on the infamous teen drama was career suicide for any of them.

It simply bugs me to no end when entertainers who are lucky enough to be one of the .001% of people who go to Hollywood and actually get that one big break that the other 99.99% percent only dream of and then whine about the typecasting or the limitations that they had to endure all while enjoying the success, money and fame that came because of that opportunity.

STFU, Michelle Williams. I believe you are just bitter because your character sucked after the first couple seasons because you have no range and the fact that Katie Holmes (and her hotness) completely overshadowed you as the show gained popularity.

You know what? Forget Michelle Williams. This post is now about how hot Katie Holmes used to be...

And last but not least...

Damn you, Tom Cruise for ruining poor Katie. Damn you!!!!

The Blood Thirsty, Pro-Life Minister

2010-12-01T19:13:00.020-05:00

I'm always amazed by the hypocrisy of pro-lifers. They'll lose their minds over the idea that people are doing away with a day old fetuses via morning after pills, but it's A-OK to strap someone to a chair and have them jolted by 1.21 gigawatts until they are charbroiled sirloin.

The quote that inspired this post came from the saintly Mick Huckabee who says of the original WikiLeaks source:

"Whoever in our government leaked that information
is guilty of treason, and I think anything less
than execution is too kind a penalty."

Nice. You gotta love a blood-thirsty minister.

What I'll never quite understand is why ALL life is not sacred to pro-lifers. If you are going to go around touting how "pro life" you are, shouldn't you actually be PRO-life -- as in support of ALL human lives -- and not just the cute, white, soon-to-be natural born citizen fetuses? Apparently it's also OK to bomb the shit out of a country who didn't even attack us and kill thousands of innocent people in the process, but putting the kibosh on a small cluster of cells is the worst sin imaginable.

Honestly, what ever happened to the idea of Thou Shalt Not Kill? Most of the pro-life enthusiasts are religious kooks yet it's like they think this rule is subjective. Was there an asterisk somewhere on the 'ol stone tablet to inform us that this commandment was up for interpretation? Sure the commandment is literally etched in stone and we accept it as fact, but...

While I'm not sure how comfortable I am with every detail that has been uncovered in this WikiLeaks ordeal, the one thing that I am sure of is that the guy who spills the beans on the government isn't deserving of being executed -- or whatever unspeakable, masochistic plans Huckabee has imagined for him.

The Summer of Epic Fail

2010-05-31T20:17:00.015-04:00

Remember when summer movies used to actually be good? Ahh... the good 'ol days when we had quality choices every single weekend of summer season. What the hell happened to those days?!?

Today, our choices seem to be a bad movie or an even worse movie. The thinking in Hollywood must be that people are so excited to see these supposed 'blockbusters' that they don't actually care how good they are.

RottenTomatoes.com really has the best system for gauging the quality of a movie. It basically takes all of the reviews from credible reviewers, adds up their individual grades and comes up with a total score. Now lets look at what we've been offered so far since the beginning of May...

Shrek Forever After - 52%
Just Wright - 49%
Letters To Juliet - 46%
MacGruber - 45%
Robin Hood - 44%
Prince of Persia - 39%
Sex in the City 2 - 16%
Killers - ??

All of these movies are classified as 'rotten' via the Rotten Tomatoes website. "Killers" doesn't have a score because they wouldn't even let critics near it before it opened. Only "Iron Man 2" managed to achieve the status of 'fresh' with a underwhelming score of 74%.

This could very well be the worst May in the modern history of cinema. It's certainly the most pitiful May that I can recall. Audiences must have felt the very same way as this was the worst Memorial Day weekend box office in 17-years. Take that Hollywood!!

It's almost insulting that they believe that audiences will see any old crap they put out there during the summer season. The problem is that unless people swear by reviews, audiences don't really have any idea how good a film is until they have already coughed up their $11.

Other than "Toy Story 3", it seems that we're only facing even more epic failure with potential stinkers like "Marmaduke", "Get Him To The Greek", "A-Team" and "Grown Ups" all on deck. This sure is shaping up to be one crummy summer at the movies...

My Advice To Big Ben: Stop Raping Women

2010-04-17T14:10:00.021-04:00

Pittsburgh Steeler legend, Terry Bradshaw, recently offered Ben Roethlisberger his advice on what should be doing to fix things in his life. The advice included getting better handlers, avoid bars and college towns, not reading prepared statements and other methods to rehabilitate his damaged image.

Interesting.

Shouldn't the advice really be for Big Ben to just stop raping women?

I mean, if Big Ben stops forcing himself on women who cannot prevent a 6'5", 250 lb. man from doing what he wants to them, I think it's safe to say that future problems might be avoided.

So far, Ben Rapelisberger has been lucky because he's:

A) An NFL superstar
B) Rich
C) White

All Plaxico Burress did was accidentally shoot himself at a bar and he went to jail for two-years. Maybe one Superbowl ring just isn't worth as much as two in the eyes of the law.

It also helps that Ben Roethlisberger had a police officer who was just as enamored with his celebrity as any other average Joe investigating the case.

Ironically, this dopey officer who helped Ben Roethlisberger the night of the 'incident' is now out of a job all because he wanted to protect the privileged in our society instead of the real victim of the crime. While justice will not be served in this case, at least karma didn't take very long to come around and set things slightly straighter.

The Sad Death of Peter Steele

2010-04-15T21:07:00.044-04:00

"Two steps forward, three steps back,

Without warning, heart attack..."

In news particularly sad to me, Peter Steele (Petrus T. Ratajczyk ) of Type O Negative passed away yesterday at the age of 48 due to heart failure. It's been a hard thing to accept from the moment I read about it this morning. Type O Negative has been one of my very favorite bands for half of my entire existence.

Having heard significantly more about Peter Steele's drug and alcohol struggles from Peter himself over the last 2 or 3 years, I suppose this news didn't entirely blindside me. It also doesn't make his death any less hard to accept.

"You love someone, there will be grief,

The kiss of death, lips of a thief..."

I became an instant fan of Type O Negative the night I first saw "Black No. 1" on Headbanger's Ball back in 1993. One single watch of the video prompted me to go out and buy Bloody Kisses for $18.99 at The Wall. That was the most I had and have ever spent on a single disc CD. Because it was so expensive, I played the hell out of it that weekend and beyond in order to justify buying an pricey CD based on one viewing of one music video.

"I hate to wish it, but I'll tell you though,

That I'm quite ready because I'm already dead..."

As I reflected on Peter Steele and Type O Negative today, as sad as it all is, I couldn't help but also smile at the many memories I have about the band and meeting Peter after shows...

I remember seeing Type O Negative open for Danzig and after the show, Peter Steele was signing autographs in just a green shirt and tighty whiteys on the step on his tour bus. You can't forget that imagery even if you want to!

I also recall after one show on the Bloody Kisses tour where a fan asked Peter Steele for a guitar pick and after he searched his pockets, he came up empty. Instead, he gave the fan a screwdriver that was in his back pocket. I'll never forget that on the next tour, the same guy brought back that very screwdriver for Peter to sign.

I'll also never forget when waiting after one show, we waited well over an hour for Peter Steele to come out of the venue. The band and the entire crew were loaded up and ready to go and Peter was the last one to exit. Everyone was waiting on him so they could go and yet when Peter did come out, he profusely apologized for the lack of time that he had, but still signed for every last person who waited for him in the rain even while the bus was honking its horn for him to get going.

The very first time I ever met Peter Steele after a show, he made the best impression. After signing for everyone, he just plopped himself up on the hood of a curbside car and just hung out with the lingering fans. It was the first 'rock star' I ever conversed with like a regular person. So you see, the reason we waited outside as many shows as we did is because we liked Peter so much as a person and he made it worth our often very long wait.

"Everything Dies,

Everything Dies...."

I have to say that one thing Peter Steele accomplished for me is that he helped desensitize death and helped open my eyes a little wider to my own mortality. So many songs related to death in one way or another that it took something that most people try not to think about and put it front and center in his music. It's hard to sing along to a song like "Everything Dies" and not have it serve as a little pinch of reality. In the real world, death isn't something to romanticize, but it's healthier to realize that you (and others) aren't going to live forever. You appreciate life more when you do.

I've been lucky enough to see Type O Negative over a dozen times over their career. The most memorable shows were the once annual Halloween concerts where the band would end the night with a giant toilet paper fight with the audience. Of all the things things I've had Peter Steele sign that have since been packed away, the one thing that has has endured on my shelf is the autographed toilet paper roll that he signed for me after one of the Halloween shows. Such a memento would probably only would make sense to those who participated in those epic TP battles!

"It's better to burn quickly and bright,
Than slowly and dull without a fight..."

As the day has gone on, the reality of Peter Steele's death has really begun to set in. At first, it just didn't seem real, but sadly, he is no longer with us. I don't doubt that his demise was, in part, due to many years of a reckless, self-abusive lifestyle which makes it somewhat difficult to see this is an untimely tragedy. Of course, it doesn't make it any less sad.

"Please don't dress in black,
When you're at his wake,
Don't go there to mourn,
But to celebrate..."

Peter Steele -- you will have forever touched my life through your music, lyrics and the many great memories you've given me. I'll always regret having missed seeing Carnivore live just once. Dammit! Thankfully, you have left a sonic legacy behind that I will get to enjoy for the rest of my own life. Thank you for everything, Peter. I will miss you.

Eagles + Vick - McNabb = Racial Cover-Up?

2010-04-05T22:16:00.046-04:00

While the nation is abuzz over the trade of Donovan McNabb to the Washington Redskins, one headline among hundreds concerning the whole ordeal really stood out: Did Eagles Get Michael Vick as Racial Cover-Up?

The writer (Zennie62) actually believes that the Eagles decision to sign Michael Vick was racially motivated and is willing to bet that he is right.

While I am willing to bet he is wrong, please allow me to set the table first...

For the last several weeks, I've been listening to various national football know-it-alls talking about how the Philadelphia Eagles were going to make a big mistake by trading Donovan McNabb. Yet, tune into the sports talk in Philly and you'll hear how fans and radio hosts alike were eager to send McNabb out of town. Is it possible that the fans in Philadelphia knew a little more about McNabb the rest of the less informed country? Absolutely.

So then it's no surprise that this bizarre headline is found on the website of a newspaper based, not in Philadelphia, but San Francisco. It's also no surprise that the writer also characterizes the decision to trade McNabb as "dumb." One then has to wonder whether the claim of a "racial cover-up" really has more to do with his dislike of the trade than anything else.

Now, if someone were a truly brushed up on the history of quarterbacking in Philadelphia, they'd recall that over the last 25-years, three players have started the overwhelming majority of football games for the Eagles:

1. Donovan McNabb
2. Rodney Peete
3. Randall Cunningham

As for the rest of the guys who have had brief stints behind center over those years, it's mostly an unimpressive list of Caucasian scrubs (Bobby Hoying, Doug Peterson, Ty Detmer, Koy Detmer, A.J. Feeley, etc.) who never started a full season for the Eagles.

Ron Jaworski was the last white Eagles quarterback to be the opening day starter in consecutive seasons way back in 1985 & 1986. Philly fans have been watching black quarterbacks guide their team through the bulk of the last 25 seasons beginning with Randall Cunningham.

Why then would the Philadelphia Eagles organization feel ANY need to protect themselves from some wild racism theory?? They shouldn't and they wouldn't.

That being the case, the claim that the Eagles signed Vick as a "racial cover-up" is completely and utterly asinine. ASININE.

You see, some NFL team was going to sign Michael Vick as a backup QB in 2009 -- so why not the Eagles?? Donovan McNabb's contract was nearing an end and with only a miserable 30-minutes of football under Kevin Kolb's belt, there certainly was a legitimate possibility that Michael Vick could have been the Eagles starter in 2010.

In terms of morals, signing Michael Vick was an awful decision. The guy is the scum of the earth. That being said, signing Señor Mexico was a relatively smart business decision by the Eagles since he basically had to settle for a crummy, low-money contract and like it.

While there are still plenty of places where African Americans don't get a fair shake in business and elsewhere, the Philadelphia Eagles are not a organization who would need protection from claims of racism. Furthermore, anyone who floats the idea that the Eagles needed to sign Michael Vick as a "racial cover-up" after 25-years of black quarterbacking is someone who only adds to the complications that we already have with racism in our country.

Good job, idiot.

Are 3D Movies Really Worth $17??

2010-03-31T19:17:00.015-04:00

A big sarcastic 'thank you' needs to go out to the 3D movie-going public who have been throwing their money away on every three-dimensional movie Hollywood has tossed at you within the last year. Because of you, the major movie theater chains are jacking up their prices all because you told them with your wallets that you were more than happy to pay $14.00+ to see movies instead of the $10 you could have paid in 2D.

Not only did you screw yourselves by causing them to jack your 3D prices by up to 25%, but you screwed the rest of us too. The regular 2D prices also went up this past weekend due to you wasteful clowns.

See, since so many of you guys don't even flinch when the guy at the counter says "$29, please" for two tickets and a couple of pairs of plastic glasses, the theater chains figured that you really wouldn't mind paying $22 for all those movies that aren't offered in 3D. Gee, thanks.

The ONLY good news that came out of the weekend was that the film that they decided to premier their higher 3D prices with, "How To Train Your Dragon", underwhelmed at the box office and left them all scratching their heads. It also resulted in Dreamworks' stock losing 9% of its value on Monday. So much for that great idea...

Unfortunately, wishing for lower prices to now return is as futile as putting toothpaste back in the tube. Prices in this line of business never go back down. We're stuck with new higher ticket prices, already sky-high concession prices and even some brand spankin' new rules from theater chains like AMC that now officially prohibit any outside food or drink -- all happening at a time when our economy is in the crapper.

It would be nice to think that there is limit where people will simply refuse to pay X-amount of money to see a movie in 3D -- or in any 'D' for that matter. Is there really a point where will people will say that paying $100 to take their family of 4 to the movies is just too much and paying $9 for a Netflix membership and $3 for a box of microwavable popcorn is just a better deal?

I admit that I'll really be rooting against this coming week's 3D offering, "Clash of the Titans". In this instance, they didn't even film the movie with the intent to show it in 3D. The 3D-ness was actually thought up in post-production and was basically added as a simple corporate cash grab. Even so, I have no doubt that plenty of suckers will be paying $15, $16 and $17 each just to see a mediocre movie that wasn't even filmed with them in mind.

KISS Finally To The Hall of Fame?

2009-09-23T21:04:00.024-04:00

A great thing happened today -- KISS was finally nominated as a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame finalist!! After qualifying for the honor 10-years ago, this is the very first time they have been elevated to the ballot.

I'm really, REALLY happy that it finally happened! Unfortunately, this is only the first hurdle. Now it will be up to the snooty Hall of Fame voters to decide. When looking over the competition, KISS' chances look pretty darn good.

As a fan for 31 of their 35-year history, I feel that eight KISS members should be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame:

Paul Stanley (1974 to present)

Gene Simmons (1974 to present)

Ace Frehley (1974-1982, 1996-2002)

Peter Criss (1974-1980, 1996-2000, 2003)

Eric Carr (1980-1991)

Bruce Kulick (1984-1995)

Eric Singer (1991-1995, 2001-2002, 2004 to present)

Tommy Thayer (2002 to present)

Personally, I agree with Paul Stanley's stance on KISS' possible induction:

"There's been a lot of people who've been a part of this, some longer than others... and some who deserve recognition more than others. Even the non-makeup years produced some platinum and double-platinum albums, and we had some very healthy sales in terms of albums and concerts through the '80s and '90s. So if we should ever be asked to accept induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, it would be something to think about."

Over the band's career, the success and longevity of KISS is due to more than the just original four members. The drumkit in KISS has actually been manned by Eric Carr & Eric Singer for 23 of the band's 35 years. For 21 of KISS' 35 years, someone other than Ace Frehley has been playing the lead guitar.

On top of that, even those figures are quite generous -- especially to Criss. Peter essentially stopped playing on KISS' studio albums after 1977's Alive II. While his face graces the cover of Dynasty (1979), Unmasked (1980) and Psycho Circus (1998), he drummed on only two songs from those three albums combined.

Ace also had a few lean KISS years where he provided minimal contribution to Music From The Elder (1981) and zero participation on Creatures of the Night (1982) and the European-released Killers (1982). He also only had slightly more involvement than Criss on the Psycho Circus album.

The point is, KISS has pretty much functioned as a team and its collective members have helped get the band to the point they are today. ALL of them deserve acknowledgement for their effort, dedication and loyalty.

According to Billboard Magazine, only the names of Stanley, Simmons, Criss and Frehley are on the ballot, but seeing how Metallica managed to induct every band member who played on a Metallica album, it gives me hope that more than just the original band will receive the honor should KISS be inducted.

Don't get me wrong, KISS would be nowhere had those four members not formed KISS in the early 70s and accomplished all that they did. However, KISS would also be nowhere today had other members not stepped in and helped the band carry on beginning almost 30-years ago when Peter Criss first departed.

I've enjoyed every lineup, every tour and every album of KISS. KISS is an entity that has survived all these years mostly due to these eight members and I just hope if/when they finally get inducted into the Hall of Fame that these eight members will be sharing in the band's long-deserved honor.

Congratulations to KISS!!

40 Years of The Haunted Mansion

2009-08-17T01:20:00.009-04:00

When hinges creak in doorless chambers,
And strange and frightening sounds echo through the halls,
Whenever candlelights flicker where the air is deathly still,
That is the time when ghosts are present practicing their terror
with ghoulish delight.

Welcome foolish mortals to The Haunted Mansion...

The Haunted Mansion is my absolute favorite attraction in the entire world! Ever since I was a little kid going to Disney World, I have always had an affinity for The Haunted Mansion. OK, maybe not the first time or two inside because it scared the bejesus out of me, but after that, it has remained my favorite ever since.

Even though I grew up with the attraction in Disney World, the true Haunted Mansion is in Disneyland. It's not just that it happens to be the original, but that it's simply more perfect. The exterior building itself is one of my favorite visuals in all the Disney parks.

The Haunted Mansion is now turning 40-years old this year. It's pretty amazing how a ride that ancient has still remained one of Disneyland's top attractions. And even though there have been technological improvements within -- especially in recent years -- by enlarge, it's still the same attraction that has been scaring and delighting guests for 4 decades.

The magic really begins the moment you enter the line as you pass by the infamous animal cemetery and humorous gravestones. The eye for detail in and outside the building is unmatched by anything else inside the resort.

You also can't give enough credit to those men and women who have to dress up in those stuffy outfits and greet you with their monotone voices and eerie glances at the door. All that just adds to the overall macabre ambiance of The Mansion and it's definitely appreciated.

Unlike most other Disney attractions, the featured character in the attraction isn't someone you ever get to see. The creepy voice of the Ghost Host guides you from the first room in the house all the way to the moment you step out of your DoomBuggy.

The Ghost Host's spiel is so darn catchy that some people feel the urge to recite it much like a person singing along to their favorite song on the radio. Obviously, this can be a bit irritating, but it's done out of love and not purposeful annoyance.

From the stretching room in the beginning to the Hitchhiking Ghosts at the end, the 10-minutes inside The Haunted Mansion is pure bliss. Happy 40th Birthday to the best attraction ever!!

Keyboard Cat Is At It Again...

2009-08-16T14:00:00.000-04:00

Where are your brains, boy??

Let's Euthanize Granny!!

2009-08-12T20:10:00.016-04:00

Why should we continue to let all the old people in America burden our healthcare system with their countless ailments and diseases that are just going to lead to them dying off anyway? As we know, the pending Democratic-supported healthcare bill has a solution built right into it: euthanize old people. Let's face it -- it makes a lot of sense.

Old people are the ones who keep our insurance rates high because they're always sick. Why should the rest of us who are not old and sick have to pay so much for insurance when we're the ones barely using it? Letting the old people croak is actually an efficient way to fix the broken healthcare system.

Oh, so you think I sound crazy, huh? Well, that's the point.

Who the fuck would support any bill that believed we should euthanize our seniors?!? The answer: NO ONE. Neither President Obama nor any Democrat in Congress supports such a thing. Who in their right mind would believe this nonsense anyway?? Well... Republicans do.

I swear these people are willfully ignorant. They choose to believe the lies and rumors they hear from the most unreliable sources and allow themselves to be convinced they are fact.

This whole Obama-is-going-to-euthanize-Granny crap started when a Congressman thought it might be a good idea for the government to pay for a fully elective visit to your doctor where you can discuss your end-of-life care / living-will. Why is this a good idea? For starters, so you don't end up like her forcing family members argue over your fate...

It's indeed true that the cost of those who express their end-of-life care to their doctor and/or in a living-will is statistically lower. When you don't linger around longer than you want to, there are less expenses in result. Of course, if you wanna lay there brain-dead for a few extra months until your organs can no longer function -- you'll still have that right too.

This helpful option has been twisted so awfully that some old people are now believing that the government is going to force them to chose how they are going to die. Good grief...

Honestly, the angry organized mobs we now see at town meetings are the fault of every Democrat in Washington who couldn't muster up the testicular fortitude to pass a healthcare bill before they left for their summer break. Now they are suffering the consequences as they go back home. Of course, WE will suffer the consequences when they come back and either don't pass the thing or give us a watered-down version that won't be good enough.

KISS Fans Who Hate KISS

2009-07-30T20:12:00.027-04:00

There are three kinds of people in this world:

1) KISS fans
2) People who aren't KISS fans
3) KISS fans who hate KISS

The latter group of people are easily the worst of all.

See, if you think KISS songs are the musical equivalent to buffalo farts -- that's perfectly fine. However, if you are going to be some whiny KISS fan who pitches continuous online fits over which 50-year old KISS member wears which clown makeup, you need to get a life or find a new hobby.

KISS has been through countless lineup changes over the years and the latest incarnation of the band is just one more in a long list. The current KISS lineup, while totally awesome, is really no different than any other lineup. It's still just KISS.

KISS' current drummer, Eric Singer, and lead guitarist, Tommy Thayer, now wear the Catman and Spaceman makeup because Peter Criss and Ace Frehley are no longer in the band. The decision concerning the makeup came as a result of Peter and Ace's discontentment with being in KISS.

In 2000, Peter Criss refused to honor his existing contract at the end of the Farewell Tour and demanded more money. Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley did not take kindly to these demands and brought back Eric Singer (the drummer who Criss replaced when KISS reunited) who finished the tour wearing the Catman persona.

In 2002, Ace Frehley refused to sign a new contract after Paul and Gene decided that KISS should continue. With Ace's decision being final, they replaced him with long-time KISS associate, Tommy Thayer.

So why can KISS still use the Catman and Spaceman makeup without Ace and Peter being in the band? Because Ace and Peter pawned off their rights to the designs for cold hard cash years ago. If those guys didn't see their own makeup designs as sacred, why should fans see it any differently?

Ever since 2001, KISS has had at least one non-original member sporting a makeup design that an original member once wore. Even though it's been 8-years, there are still people bellyaching over it like it happened yesterday.

The most amusing example of this childish behavior is this particular retard who wholely embodies the ridiculousness of it all...

I remember when I was a little kid and believed that Paul, Gene, Ace and Peter were really their characters. Because of that, the makeup mattered to little kids like me. In 1983, KISS took off the makeup and revealed themselves to really be four regular and somewhat ugly guys.

But today, it's not little kids who are crying about the makeup, but grown adults acting like little kids over this situation. They pick internet fights, post endless criticisms and even start little hate forums in protest. Let's just get one thing straight: A KISS fan who hates KISS isn't a KISS fan at all.

Anyhow, until puberty hits these 30 and 40-year olds, Eric Singer has an undergarment recommendation for all the cry-babies out there...

Newsflash: Glenn Beck Is Insane

2009-07-28T20:16:00.013-04:00

Every once and a while, a right-wing lunatic gives us a gift-wrapped present with a bow. Today's offering comes via Glenn Beck of Fox News.

Beck claims that the current President of the United States is a 'racist'. Yes, a racist. Our half-white President hates white people. Leave it to true racists to forget that little fact.

Republicans also believe this is chocolate ice cream...

Beck claims that President Obama has, "...a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture." He then went on to contradict himself -- and then contradict the contradiction -- by saying, "I'm not saying he doesn't like white people. He has a problem. This guy is, I believe, a racist."

So let's sum up:

1) Obama has a deep-seated hatred for white people.
2) Obama may not hate white people.
3) Obama is, in fact, a racist.

Part of me wishes nothing but ill-will upon Beck, but in a lot of ways, this kinda of stuff only helps keep the GOP out of touch and out of power -- and that's a good thing.

There's no doubt that there's a small portion of this country who agree with Beck. These people also believe that President Obama an illegal alien and a Muslim to boot. But for this mainstream personality to go and spout such craziness, it just shows that the GOP is still just a party of white guys who consistantly oppose minorities in our country.

It has been projected that by 2050, minorities in America will become the majority. All I know is if this kind of nonsense on the Right continues to occur, the GOP will be a dead party by then -- and, IMO, that really can't come soon enough.

C'mon Glenn Beck. It's time to enter the 21st century. Even some of your biggest supporters have caught up with the times...

"Bruno" is the "Unbreakable" of 2009

2009-07-19T02:40:00.012-04:00

Since the release of "Bruno", I've had seen a host of negative reviews for the film that really had me wondering how Sacha Baron Cohen could have gotten this film so wrong. After seeing the film, I believe I understand why some people feel as they do.

It seems that many of these reviewers who see "Bruno" in a negative light do so because the film did not live up to the greatness of "Borat". However, this is not a flaw with the film; it is a flaw with the viewer.

"Borat" was a masterpiece. The specialness of "Borat" was like lightning in a bottle that could never be duplicated and it's partially why Cohen retired the character. "Bruno" is obviously cut from the same cloth as "Borat", but fails to amaze us in the same way because this kind of film is no longer original to us. We've now been there and done that.

"Bruno" is a very funny movie, but it's unfortunate that it cannot escape the large shadow that "Borat" has cast. It reminds me very much in how M. Night Shyamalan's "Unbreakable" could not live up to his legendary, "Sixth Sense".

Even though we knew we were getting an entirely different movie with M. Night's sophmore effort, many people were still expecting, "The Sixth Sense II". When they didn't get that or an ending that impacted them as much, they saw it as a disappointment. The truth is that "Unbreakable" did not fail us; people's expectations failed them.

"Unbreakable" is a very good stand-alone film and also has a pretty darn good ending -- it's just that the ending isn't in the same league as "The Sixth Sense" (although very few movie endings are). It's a shame that some people have let this affect their appreciation for this film.

Admittedly, "Bruno" was not as great as "Borat", but that doesn't mean it wasn't good. Personally, I laughed more than not during those 90-minutes. If you compare "Bruno" to every other comedy released over the last 5-years, IMO, it would only be bested by no more than a handful of them.

I am absolutely convinced that if there were never a "Borat", more people would love with this film. Even part of me is guilty of comparing the two, but I never let it get in the way of my enjoyment of this film. Unfortunately, others are unable to leave "Borat" out of the equation when watching this movie. It's really their loss because "Bruno" is a pretty darn good flick.

Sweet Mother of God!

2009-07-13T21:32:00.005-04:00

Brace yourself...

The Best of Johnny Depp

2009-07-11T02:50:00.007-04:00

Having recently seen Johnny Depp in "Public Enemies", I got thinking about which are the best characters he's played over the years. Here are the ones that I thought he shined the brightest in:

5. Sweeney Todd

No only does Depp have to pull off playing a Brit, but he has to sing in this movie as well -- a lot of singing, actually. For someone who isn't as gifted as maybe a Hugh Jackman when it comes to this sort of thing, Depp easily earns an 'E' for effort when it comes to this creepy performance.

4. Willy Wonka

While it's not the best movie, Depp puts his own spin on Wonka that is quite compelling. There's no doubt that Michael Jackson was, at least in part, an influence on how he tackled this role. There are just too many similarities in appearance, speech, circumstance and life-story. Regardless, Depp carries the movie on his back and keeps you interested the entire way.

3. John Wilmot, The Earl of Rochester

Unless you've seen "The Libertine" on cable, it's likely that you probably haven't witnessed Depp in this role. John Wilmot is not more than a stone's throw away from Depp's infamous Jack Sparrow character, but he's even more arrogant and self-interested than Captain Jack. Actually, in some ways, Wilmot's lifestyle is probably more pirate-like than Disney allows Jack Sparrow to be.

My favorite scene in "The Libertine" is when Wilmot and his wife are posed while being painted for a portrait. Wilmot looks out the window and expresses interest in having a trained street monkey in their portrait as well. His wife then storms out of the room infuriated by the notion. As we later see, the finished painting only features Wilmot and the monkey...

2. Raoul Duke

I HATED this movie the first time I saw "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas". I can stress how much I disliked it. However, in the last year, it's been sporatically on HBO and I've reaquainted and made peace with it. In the process, I also realized that Depp is fantasic in this role as the half-cocked, paranoid goofball based on Hunter S. Thompson.

And number one...

1. Captain Jack Sparrow

None of Depp's other characters come close to being as impressive as Captain Jack. As great as Depp has been in his variety of roles, he created an iconic character out of his own very talents. So many lead characters are well-defined before an actor is even casted, but Depp molded this character from his own idea of who he should be -- a combination of Keith Richards and Pepé Le Pew. The result was pure magic.

I am quite looking forward to seeing Johnny Depp's next endeavour where he plays one of the many oddball characters who reside in the upside down world of Wonderland. Depp will portray the Mad Hatter.

Ahmadinejad Upset With Twitter

2009-07-07T00:01:00.002-04:00

Ahmadinejad thinks we're jerks...

Well If The Martians Aren't Worried...

2009-07-05T00:01:00.005-04:00

Did you know that those who go around claiming that global warming is a myth are now citing the fact that the temperatures on Mars, Jupiter and Saturn are also rising? Yes, really. I heard this one on the Sean Hannity radio show on Thursday.

First off, conservatives need to get their stories straight. While they often call global warming a myth, they are using examples like this to claim that it all may just be some general warming within our solar system. Even if that were the case, wouldn' they then finally have to admit that it's actually happening? Well, they're not exactly saying that either.

The thing I found especially humorous in this example is that we already know Martians, Jupiterians and the Saturians aren't affected by the warming in the same way we are. Is it their ability to deal with the heat better than we can or is it that they are better at living under ground than we are? No. It's because they don't fucking exist!!

The combined living population on Mars, Jupiter and Saturn is zero. The temperatures on those planets can rise 100-degrees in a single day and while all kinds of crazy atmospheric shit might happen, it ain't gonna affect one life on those planets. On our planet, though, it's quite a different story.

Whether people believe global warming is man-made or just a natural cycle really doesn't matter. Humanity is headed for some big trouble if people don't collectively decide to counter the warming that is going on. Citing the rising temperatures on three other sister planets doesn't then mean that we shouldn't do anything about our own problems with such warming.

I think Al Gore put it best. He said that it may cost a lot to counter global warming and some might say it's too expensive to address, but if you do nothing and the planet gets too hot, what good will all the saved money be worth when it's too late?

The reality of global warming isn't going to mean more of this...

The reality of global warming is going to lead to more of this...

Good Riddance

2009-07-03T17:38:00.025-04:00

Today, the wackjob from Alaska announced her resignation from being the governor of that crazy state of hers. Whoo-hoo!!

The good news is that it's over for Sarah Palin in politics. I don't think she realizes that fact yet, but when you quit being governor after just 2-and-a-half years into your first term -- you're done. People would only wonder whether she would quit again if she were elected to any other office.

This decision today just seems too erratic. I cannot recall the last major political figure resigning from office with a good reason. In fact, they are almost always for bad reasons.

I just think The Wicked Witch of Wasilla sees this as a chance to fill up her bank account. In three weeks, she will become a private citizen and will be able to tour 'the lower 48' and get paid hundreds of thousands of dollars per speech. Her star is still bright in the eyes of certain people and she can make a lot more money as a private person in one year than she ever could in a lifetime as a politician.

So goodbye, Sarah Palin. No matter what you say or do from this point going forward, you will never again get the chance to have your hand in our country's political system. It was sure fun watching you implode your political career this afternoon.

Most Americans Get This Wrong

2009-06-29T22:21:00.006-04:00

I wonder why we're so bad at answering this one...

Hahahahaha

2009-06-26T04:50:00.019-04:00

I almost did a little happy dance when the news broke that Republican Governor, Mark Sanford, was banging some Argentinian woman for 5-days last week instead of spending a nice Father's Day home with his wife and 4 sons. What a guy!

I think this was even a little more satisfying than when Republican Senator, John Ensign, admitted last week that he was banging a married woman who worked for his campaign. The sex was so good that he doubled her salary and employed her son as well!

Personally, I kinda miss the days when these swines would drag their wives to the news conferences for the sake of publicly humiliating them a la Republican Senator, David Vitter, who was banging prostitutes.

Shed no tears for her, though. The tough talking Wendy Vitter once said that she could not be forgiving like Hillary Clinton, but "a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt" while commenting on the Monica Lewinsky scandal. Apparently, this was a hollow statement as David Vitter is still in one piece and Mrs. Vitter is still Mrs. Vitter.

And not only was he paying for his sex, but apparently Davey Boy enjoyed running around in a diaper and pooping himself according to the girls he employed. Nice... LOL

And you gotta love that Fox News Network. When an embattled Republican stands up in front of everyone to confess how he's been cheating on his wife, what do they do? They label him a Democrat...

I'm sure it was just an honest accident -- although it's happened before...

And again...

I even subjected myself to listening to a little Sean Hannity over the last couple days just to hear him and his idiotic audience offer forgiveness to Sanford simply because he's a Republican and, of course, blame Democrats for being even worse. The irony is if Sanford had said and done everything the same way, but had been a Democrat, Hannity and his minions would be calling for his resigination and making Sanford out to be the posterboy for all Democrats. These people are such frauds.

Let's face it -- the GOP is the party of hypocrisy. Their nonsensical 'moral values' crap only applies when it's convenient and they only point out the violators when it concerns people they oppose. They went on a witch hunt to impeach Bill Clinton and guys like Ensign, Sanford and Diaper Dave Vitter all supported the cause. Yet, when it comes to themselves and other people in their party, the rules are then somehow different. Fucking hypocrites...

R.I.P. The King of Pop

2009-06-25T22:26:00.019-04:00

I was in elementary school when Michael Jackson became the biggest thing on Earth. Everyone in my grade sans three kids were fans of him -- and I was one of those three! See, as a KISS fan, I loved hard rock and completely rejected the pop stylings of Michael Jackson. Yet, when I was at home, his MTV videos from the Thriller album slowly wore down my defenses and eventually I couldn't help but like the videos and the songs.

While the utter coolness of the "Thriller" video prompted me to turn in my membership to the Michael Jackson Haters Club, it was the awesomeness of Captain EO at EPCOT Center in Disney World that really won me over.

I had already been pondering whether I would go see Michael live if he ever toured the states again and I was definitely leaning towards YES. Too bad I will never get that chance.

I certainly felt some sadness today as the grim news came in. It's a shame that he didn't have a little more time to repair his image with the concerts he had planned. No matter what strangeness went on in his personal life, the pop legend will be missed.

Friday Night Metal!

2009-06-19T23:36:00.014-04:00

Radio where I grew up was the worst -- at least to me it was. Not a single station would play heavy metal in their normal rotation ever. The only shining moment came on Friday nights where one station would have an all-metal show for 2-hours starting around midnight.

Tonight, it dawned how awesome that show was way-back-when and without it, how I might not have gotten into the bands that I did. Traditional radio still blows today, but at least there are more ways to listen to and discover the kinds of music you want without having to depend on the FM dial.

So, in tribute to those Friday night metal shows (The Metal Shop and For Rockers Only), I'm posting some mother-f%#king metal tonight!!

The GOP Plan to Fix Healthcare: Fear

2009-06-16T00:35:00.012-04:00

On Monday, President Obama was pitching his plan for healthcare reform to the American Medical Association. Of course, on the conservative airwaves, they spent plenty of time demonizing his plan. I listened to some of Sean Hannity in the afternoon so I could hear him lie and pitch a fit about it -- and of course, he did.

Republicans have a hard time fighting against this because they aren't really for anything. All they can do is pitch fear (like they always do) in an effort to get people to oppose something. In this case, Hannity talks about how Obama's plan will have the government making our medical decisions and will result in us to having to wait days/weeks instead of receiving immediate medical care. Of course, this is all lies.

See, this was their defense against implementing true universal healthcare -- something Obama (unfortunately) is not proposing. All Obama is trying to push is a public healthcare option that will be available to anyone who wants it. Of course, if people opt to not participate in that particular plan, they can still keep their own coverage.

Ultimately, the only group of people who benefit from the Republican opposition to real healthcare reform are the rich, for-profit insurance companies. How nice. Meanwhile the nearly 50 million of uninsured people are supposed to remain shit out of luck.

So if Obama's plan is so bad, what is the alternative fix to the healthcare crisis from the other side of the aisle? Let me go into specific detail of the alternative healthcare plan that Republicans are pushing and fully support:

...and that's the GOP's entire plan to fix healthcare. Like it? I sure don't.

Kettle, Meet Gene Simmons

2009-06-11T18:55:00.016-04:00

Gene Simmons has been asked quite a bit about performing with American Idol finalist, Adam Lambert, as of late. And while mostly everything has been generally praise-worthy towards Lambert, Gene goes and blurts out this on Good Day Philadelphia:

"Mostly he should shut up about his sexual preferences.
We, America, the rest of the world, really don't care.
I mean, if the story becomes 'I prefer farm animals to,'
you know, who cares?"

Wow, that's an interesting statement coming from the guy never seems to shut up about his own sexual preferences:

Now if Gene wanted to say that he thinks that Adam Lambert's decision to speak openly about being gay is a mistake career-wise, he should just say so. But for him to say that Lambert should 'shut up' about his sexual preferences after Gene himself has spent decades talking about his own sexual preferences and the number of women he has bedded down is hypocritical to say the least.

I can honestly say that I care as little about who Lambert prefers sexually as I do who Gene Simmons prefers sexually. Yet, since the mid-80s, I've had to endure watching/listening/reading Gene blather on about his sexual preferences hundreds and hundreds of times over. I wish Gene would learn to take his own advice.

The Best of Christian Bale

2009-06-07T23:34:00.014-04:00

Having just seen "Terminator Salvation" this past weekend, it got me thinking about Christian Bale's best movies...

5. Reign of Fire

Filmed before Matthew McConaughey became Mr. Chick Flick, Christian Bale and McConaughey team up to save the world from an infestation of dragons. Bale's character had gone a lifetime without seeing a single dragon killed and yet to save human existence, he sets out with McConaughey to kill the sole male dragon who happens to be the biggest, nastiest one of them all.

4. Rescue Dawn

This entire movie is driven by Bale's performance. It's even more compelling because it's a true story. Bale eating a bowl of live maggots is as impressive as it is disgusting. Obviously, he cares a great deal about his craft. How many other actors would have done that? Not many.

3. Equilibrium

Our story takes place in a totalitarian state where citizens are no longer allowed to possess things that cause them to feel. No books, no mementos and no cute fluffy doggies. Bale plays a high-level enforcer of these rules, but the cute fluffy doggy breaks him. Bale takes it upon himself to change the rules via brute force.

2. 3:10 to Yuma

Two great actors and one great ending. Westerns are not something I particularly care for, but the movie is too good to let that get in the way.

And numero uno....

1. American Psycho

One of my all-time favorite films with one of my all-time favorite characters. I remember seeing this film opening weekend when Bale was virtually an unknown. When I walked out of the theater, he had a new fan. His acting is supurb and the story is scary, funny, and awesome all at the same time. Love it! Love it! Love it!

No, "Terminator Salvation" didn't make the cut nor did his Batman films either. While I enjoyed them all, his presence in them was not especially important to their overall quality. Could other actors played those roles as well as he did? Probably. Could anyone have played Patrick Bateman as well in "American Psycho"? Absolutely not. I chose these films because I felt that Bale's contribution played a big part in why these five movies are as good as they are.

In closing, I will post my favorite quote from Christian Bale:

"I will never say never, but I will say never to doing the more typical romantic comedies. You know, unless I’m getting audited and I’m on the street and I desperately need some dough and that’s the only thing that I’m getting."

Hopefully, it'll never come to that. It does make me wonder if Matthew McConaughey is being audited, though...

Have Republicans Gone Nuts?

2009-06-04T22:38:00.009-04:00

Today on the Drudge Report, they posted a claim that President Obama was sporting a moustache in Egypt. Oh really...

First off, where the hell is it?!? I shouldn't need a magnifying glass in order to see it if he grew such a thing for this speech.

I suppose that such a claim either implies that Obama is trying to appease Middle-Easterners, or that he's really one of them, or... or... who the fuck knows what they really mean by it. The claim is not actually tied to a story so it's up to the reader to make their own assumption. Unfortunately the photo evidence is flimsier than a Lock Ness Monster sighting -- only, with less convincing proof.

I swear -- if the GOP stopped selling Americans fear, what would they have left to sell us? Certainly not ideas.

MTV Music Awards... Who Watches Anymore??

2009-06-01T20:12:00.012-04:00

Not me -- and for good reason. After reading the results in an article on IMDB.com, there was one thing that was crystal clear: No one with a penis watches this show anymore.

"Twilight" won for Best Movie as it inexplicably beat out "The Dark Knight" and "Slumdog Millionaire". Reviewer Bob Grimm of the Tuscan Weekly maybe summed "Twilight" up best: "Dumbest vampire movie... ever."

Who in their right mind would have voted for this garbage?!? Oh right... teenage girls who, quite frankly, have a proven track record when it comes to taste in quality movies.

Clearly this was the only demographic that cared enough to vote for these awards as "Twilight" racked up 5 awards while "High School Musical 3" trailed right behind with 3 awards. The icing on the cake was Miley Cyrus earning an award for the Best Song. Good fucking God...

In what bizarro world does the MTV Movie Awards exist in?? Certainly not one that has any relevance when Zac Efron beats out Christian Bale and Robert Downey Jr. for Best Male Performance and Kristen Stewart wins over the likes of Angelina Jolie and Kate Winslet for Best Female Perfomance.

Why would any person over 21 watch this program when the most undeserving people are walking away with awards? Every winner -- sans one -- was from a movie deemed 'rotten' via Rotten Tomatoes. And the only reason Heath Ledger won was not because he died, but because no one from "Twilight" was nominated in his category!

Anyhow, MTV sucks so incredibly hard these days and nothing embodied this fact more than the results of this idiotic, irrelevant award show.

God Bless The GOP

2009-05-27T01:55:00.015-04:00

Sometimes you gotta love Republicans.

Right after President Obama announces Sonya Sotomayor as his Supreme Court Justice nominee, I see and hear various conservative talking-heads calling her things like "racist", "not smart", "radical", "activist judge", "unqualified", etc.. Me thinks Christmas is coming early if this keeps up.

Here you have the first ever Hispanic nominee -- and she's a woman. Now you have the party of white guys with a storied history of racism and 'tradition values' (meaning that they prefer women to be barefoot & pregnant and in the home doing the laundry & washing the dishes) calling her dumb and racist. Nice. In fact, it's downright awesome!!

Here you take the Latino community who are the fastest growing group of people in America and you are considering waging a war over her. Unlike African-Americans, Latino-Americans are not all-in with Democrats -- yet. They're heading this way, but they still have shown to have some swing to their vote.

But what is clear is that they don't like the GOP's ideas when it comes to immigration reform (a.k.a. Operation: Throw Them All The Fuck Out) and they don't like the GOP messing with their chance to have representation on the Supreme Court.

I'm just praying that the wackos on the Right decide to start running ads and continue running their mouths because it'll just lead to more years of Democratic dominance in Washington. There's absolutely no doubt that this one is a losing battle, but I hope no one tells the GOP. Shhhhhhh....

Play Him Off, Kitteh...

2009-05-24T02:32:00.004-04:00

Fucking Dick...

10 Years of Jar Jar Binks

2009-05-19T18:56:00.017-04:00

Today marks the 10th anniversary of the release of "Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace". There have been few movies I had been more excited about seeing -- and few that have left me feeling more disappointed.

You can't help but wonder if George Lucas would do anything different if he had to do it all over again. I know I would...

For starters, Jar Jar Binks should have been aborted from Star Wars lore with a rusty wire hanger. It's hard to believe that there wasn't another person involved with the making of "Phantom Menace" who could have alerted Lucas to this disaster in the making. It's a shame that Binks wasn't the one ordered to live out the remainder of his days frozen in carbonite.

Then there's the tragedy of Darth Maul. What did Maul have -- maybe 3 lines of dialog in the entire film? While they marketed the shit out of him, he sure wasn't the next coming of Darth Vader. More like the next coming (and going) of Boba Fett. To take the coolest character, make him have zero significance to the overall story and then let him die like a total chump was a mind-bogglingly bad decision.

No, what us Star Wars fans were really hankering to see was a 60-minute pod race featuring some annoying little kid.

And then there was the unimaginitive dialog, a host of uninteresting supporting characters, not one titillating glimpse of The Emperor and the unnecessary death of Qui-Gon Jin -- the best character (and actor) in the movie.

Saying all of that, I don't hate the film. As a Star Wars geek, I still watch it occasionally, but the fixable flaws are so obvious and you can't help think about what could have been. The missteps in the making of this movie will piss me off to the day I die.

Even this concept may have worked better in hindsight...

Dumb Athlete Quote of the Day

2009-05-17T01:30:00.000-04:00

"This is how I feel -- if you want to see the
Pittsburgh Steelers, invite us when we don't win the Super Bowl.
As far as I'm concerned, he would've invited Arizona if they had won."
—James Harrison on President Obama inviting the
Pittsburgh Steelers to the White House.

Well no fucking shit, Sherlock. Is it really a new concept to you that the President of the United States traditionally invites only the championship winning team to the White House?? Or are you just so arrogant that you believe that President Obama should want the Steelers coming there and be honored by your presence? Pah-leez...

Just based on the fact that this is the same idiot who threw a blatant punch at a player in the Superbowl that could have -- rather should have -- ejected him from the game, I would be inclined to believe that the guy isn't the sharpest tool in the shed.

Not All Cats Were Created Equal...

2009-05-16T00:51:00.002-04:00

WWJD? Not What 62% of Christians Would Do

2009-05-13T18:20:00.032-04:00

Today a PEW Research poll was released showing that 62% of evangelical Protestants support torture sometimes or often.

So wait -- does that mean that these people also agree with the torturing of this guy??

That cross isn't just some iconic trinket; it's the thing Jesus was tortured on! Maybe I'm just ill-informed about where the Bible condones torturing people. It just seems to me that a guy who was brutally tortured would likely not support such actions -- especially someone who preached about turning the other cheek:

You have heard that it was said,
'An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.'
But I tell you, do not resist an evil person.
If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.

—Matthew 5:38-39, NIV

Instead, the right-wing evangelicals prefer the writings from the gospel of Stone Cold:

I just whooped your ass!
—Austin 3:16, WWE

Oh, but I suppose the stuff that Jesus was spouting off about was way back before planes were flown into skyscrapers and the like. True. But if the Bible has grown outdated in instances like this, then why isn't it outdated when it comes to not letting women become priests, opposing condoms, opposing gays and opposing women who have taken semi-nude pictures to enter beauty pageants? Oh wait... apparently the last example is OK now.

Point being, evangelicals -- at least 62% of them -- are clearly putting their politics before religion. It's mind-boggling how those who would condemn what happened to Jesus would support similar actions today so as long as it's their side doing the torturing.

Mmmm... Christian Values

2009-05-12T19:43:00.013-04:00

So I'm watching this tool from the Family Research Council on MSNBC as I type this and this guy said that Carrie Prejean was basically cruicified for her Christian values.

Christian values, eh?

Boy, Christian values sure turn me on. If this is what counts as 'Christian values', I might have to sign back up again.

You'll notice that almost every person who defends this women almost all agree with her homophobic beliefs. They also manage to ignore the fact that she lied multiple times about her pictures and that her 'Christian values' are pretty fucking selective. For example...

I may not agree with her 'fuck the gays' stance, but the reason(s) why she shouldn't be Miss California has nothing to do with her position on same-sex marriage. It's that she's a total liar, a hypocrite for citing her Christian beliefs for her stance, being a spokesperson for a hate group while she is the reigning Miss California and, most importantly, that her naked & semi-naked pictures are a clear violation of the pageant (and Christian) rules.

This whole thing ticks me off because she gets rewarded for breaking the written rules and lying solely because she's good for business. Let's face it -- that's all the guy with the funny hair really cares about. Does anyone even know who the name of the actual Miss USA?

Ok, I think I've ranted more than enough about this skank, so here's one more very Christian photo of her for the road...

The Irony of Conservatives

2009-05-11T20:11:00.021-04:00

I find it funny how many conservatives today have taken such issue with what Wanda Sykes had to say about Rush Limbaugh at the White House Correspondents' Dinner on Saturday night.

It's been labeled "disgusting", "dispicable" and "deplorable" by the wackos on the Right and yet, some of these same people were sticking up for Miss California, Carrie Prejean, saying that she had a right to speak her opinion.

Well, if I'm not mistaken, isn't it Wanda Sykes' right to say that she hopes Rush Limbaugh's kidneys fail just as much as it is for the homophobic airhead from CA to say that she's against gay marriage?? I guess it's not when you don't agree.

Just because people have a right to an opinion, they shouldn't then be exempt from the shit-storm of criticism that comes because of it. If people think the homophobic chick is a bigot, then people have the right to say so. If people feel that Ms. Sykes went too far by saying Rush should be waterboarded, people also have a right to disagree (even if Rush does deserve such treatment).

And to be serious for a second, Rush Limbaugh's heart is much more likely to fail before his kidneys ever will. I mean, just look at the guy...

More Christian Craziness

2009-05-09T01:08:00.013-04:00

So there's this poor kid in Ohio who attends a fundamentalist Baptist school who faces expulsion if he attends his girlfriend's prom. His nutty school forbids dancing, rock music, hand-holding and kissing. Talk about no fun...

The big question is what this has to do with HER prom? Good question. His school says that their shitty rules still apply. I call shenanigans.

The deal is that they're going to suspend him if he attends her prom -- which, in result, will totally mess up his graduation -- and they'll expel him if he gets drunk or porks her. So what are they gonna do -- spy on him??

First off, we all know that kids don't do anything like that at proms. They're too young to do such things..

Secondly, I'm sure the students are her school are well-behaved young people. That particular school's most famous graduate is Pittsburgh Steelers QB, Ben Roethlisberger and seeing how he turned out, I'm sure there is nothing to worry about...

Seriously though, I feel bad for this kid. His wacky school's rules shouldn't apply beyond the school's grounds.

The principle of Crazy University claims, "In life, we constantly make decisions whether we are going to please self or please God." Obviously, he is implying that going to prom does not please God. Where the hell in the Bible does it say that?? Is God really that much of a hard-ass?

The kid says he's still going to the prom and I sure hope that he does. This school and its principle do not speak for God -- they just think they do. If God is this anti-fun, then what good is He?

Miss Hypocrite

2009-05-06T01:27:00.020-04:00

You have to love the hypocricy of the God-loving, gay-haters out there. The one in the forefront right now is Miss California, Carrie Prejean.

So the great news is that Miss California has posed semi-nude (and quite possibly fully nude) some time before becoming Miss California. How Christian of her to pose for pictures that are taken for the sole purpose of guys jerking-off to them.

Fap! Fap! Fap!

You know, I can still remember the nun going through the list of sins we might just wanna confess before my being confirmed way back in CCD and one of them was 'inappropriately touching yourself'. I literally LOL'ed in the classroom (partly out of guilt) which then prompted her to reaffirm, "Yes, that is a sin." Even if it was a sin, I still felt it was best to leave that one out when confessing to Father before the big moment.

So after the first racey pic leaked out onto the interwebs yesterday, she comes out and says...

"I am a Christian, and I am a model. Models pose for pictures, including lingerie and swimwear photos."

So what Miss Christian is saying is that because modeling is her job, it gives her permission to pose for lingerie photos that are intented to sexually arouse folks. I wonder what her church would say about these pictures? And I sure can't wait to see how the Miss California pageant is going to deal with these rule-breaking photos...

"Recently, photos taken of me as a teenager have been released surreptitiously to a tabloid Web site that openly mocks me for my Christian faith."

Surreptitiously, eh? Well, either she has one hell of a thesaurus on her computer or this wasn't written by my new favorite panty model. She continues...

"I am not perfect, and I will never claim to be. But these attacks on me and others who speak in defense of traditional marriage are intolerant and offensive. While we may not agree on every issue, we should show respect for others' opinions and not try to silence them through vicious and mean-spirited attacks."

You know what? Fuck you.

I'm tired of all this 'we all have a right to our own opinion' crap. I guess the KKK and Nazi's have a right to their opinion too. And also these jerkwads who protest dead soldiers' funerals for who knows what reason...

Just because someone has an opinion doesn't mean that people have to like it or respect it. In this case, Miss California's opinion deals with the civil rights of human beings and her wanting to ensure that those people never achieve equal rights. Now her and her opinion are part of the 2M4M group that is out there trying to stop this group of people from achieving equal rights.

I always have to laugh at the irony of at those who go on to preach about their Christian beliefs and then do things that seem to defy those beliefs whether it is related or unrelated.

It's all about cherry-picking the Bible and holding only those things which they agree with nearest and dearest to their heart. The most judgemental Christians seem to be the masters of this practice.

Fox-y News

2009-05-05T02:18:00.026-04:00

Now that I'm watching more daytime news these days, I've really come to appreciate Contessa Brewer on MSNBC. Wait, did I imply that I think she's great at her job? I actually just meant that she's a total fox. My TV can be on mute and I enjoy her doing whatever she's doing all the same.

Ok, to be honest, I like Contessa's personality too... but did I mention that she's a total babe? Well, she is. ;)

Anyhow, after researching this news hottie on the interwebs, I found out that racist radio host, Don Imus, had some beef with her when he heard that she called him a "cantankerous old fool" back in 2005.

First off, can you even fault her for saying that?? In fact, it's pretty difficult to see where she was wrong in her evaluation of Imus.

Apparently, Contessa continued on to say that Imus didn't know how to relate to "beautiful women". His contankerous response was, "With that fat ass she’s got, she wouldn’t be one of ‘em. Plus, she’s dumber than dirt … Oh, my God, what a pig.. . . That’s why they have those big double-doors there at MSNBC, you know, so they can get her fat ass in makeup."

Why I oughta...

Coming from that guy, what does any slight really amount to anyway? He looks like Frankenstein Monster with a gray mop on his head for fuck's sake. Beautiful women probably go running and screaming in the opposite direction seeking a torch or a pitchfork to keep him at bay.

Anyway... to Contessa's credit, I occasionally enjoy her reporting as well. For example, watching her get all irrate about Republican chicanery in this clip is quite a turn on... intellectually. Go get 'em Contessa!

Conservatives THINK They Get Colbert...

2009-04-28T21:43:00.012-04:00

So apparently when conservatives watch the Colbert Report, they think Colbert actually means what he says. Are you guys serious???

Ohio State University did a study that says that conservatives think that Colbert only pretends to be joking, but really means what he says. Talk about a bunch of people who don't get comedy and satire.

I suppose that they don't grasp the fact that Stephen Colbert's routine is based on conservative asshat, Bill O'Reilly. Of course, he's also goofing on the whole bunch of conservative wingnuts who lose their minds over all-things liberal.

And don't they know that Stephen Colbert -- the man, not the character -- has admitted that he's a Democrat? Duh...

I suppose this means that he really IS against gay marriage...

Goodbye Texas -- And Take Oklahoma With Ya!

2009-04-27T02:25:00.016-04:00

Douche bags like Gov. Rick Perry of Texas pretty much deserve what they are asking for. Perry brazonly spoke of his state seceding from the union during National Teabagger Day a couple of weeks ago, but all the sudden when the pig flu shows up on his state's doorstep, he gets on his knees and begs for the federal government's help -- how ironic! What's the term... all hat and no cattle?

Anyhow, if you need help packing your bags, Texas, just ask...

JCVD + Dolph Lundgren = Awesome!!

2009-04-25T02:29:00.022-04:00

While some people get all excited when they see the first still shot of the upcoming "Transformers" and "Iron Man" movies, seeing this picture is the one that got me all giddy. It's the first still for "Universal Soldier 3". Oh yeah!!

We're looking right there at Jean Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren conspiring to kick some ass, baby! I'm a pretty big fan of the original film. I mean, how ofter do you see two major league actions stars go toe-to-toe in a movie?? Their egos are usually too big to be the guy who gets the beat-down so it rarely ever happens.

Looks like JCVD and Ivan Drago are going to reek havoc tag-team style this time 'round. I just hope this gem doesn't wind up going straight-to-DVD.